Archive for the 'Think over this …… ;)' Category

16
Oct
09

Top 10 Stupid questions!!!

10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations.

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends…
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are you doing here?

Answer:-
Don’t u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on
your feet…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?

Answer:-
No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia…..why don’t you try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the ‘Butter Paneer Masala’ dish good??
Answer:-
No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also
spit in it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after
years…
Stupid Question:-
Munna, Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
Answer:-
Well you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask…
Stupid Question:-
Is the guy you’re marrying good?
Answer:-
No, he’s a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout…it’s just the
money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:-
No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or
not.
You thought I was sleeping….you dumb witted moron.

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
Stupid Question:-
Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:-
No, its autumn and I’m shedding……

9. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…

Stupid Question:-
Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-
No it wont. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks…
Stupid Question:-
Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:-
Gosh, it’s a miracle …….it was a piece of chalk and now it’s in
flames!!!

16
Oct
09

The Empty Jar And 2 Cups of Coffee


The Pholosophy of The Empty Jar And 2 Cups of Coffee


http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2007/04/03/nyregion/04teach
When things in your life seem, Almost too much to handle, When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the story of the empty jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students, If the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.
He then asked The students again If the jar was full..

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with an unanimous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced Two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents Into the jar, effectively
Filling the Empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor, As the laughter subsided,
‘I want you to recognize that This jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things – God, family, children, health, friends, and favorite passions – things that if everything else was lost
and only they remained, Your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter Like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else — The small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ He continued, ‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So…
Pay attention to the things That are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time
To clean the house and fix the disposal.

‘Take care of the golf balls first — The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.’

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
‘I’m glad you asked’.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a cup of coffee with a friend.


16
Oct
09

Corporate Lesson 1

Knock Knock………

A new vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on the door on the first house of the street. A tall lady answered the door. Before she could speak, the enthusiastic salesman barged into the living room and opened a big black plastic bag and poured all the cow droppings onto the carpet.

“Madam, if I could not clean this up with the use of this new powerful Vacuum cleaner in the next 10 mins, I will EAT all this dung!” Exclaimed the eager salesman.

“Do you need chilly sauce or ketchup with that” asked the lady.

The bewildered salesman asked, “Why, madam??”

“There’s no electricity in the house…” said the lady. 

Lesson: Gather all details, including environmental variables, before working on any project and committing to the client…!!!




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